kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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