I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
