I wish life had little blips of pornography
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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