I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
