Nicole vs. Life
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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