I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
