Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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