If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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