He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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