Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize