i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
