absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize