Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
the liver wants what the liver wants
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
