He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
