She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
