My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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