then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
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they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I need moral support for this bender
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
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Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
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