This girl is more easily done than said...
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
