There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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