it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
