I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
