I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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