you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
