He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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