I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Randomize
