I hate all girls vehemently.
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
COCAINE IS GR8
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize