Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize