You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
