yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
