I hope mine doesn't look like that
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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