your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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