Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
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