He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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