There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Randomize
