My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize