is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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