I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
