**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
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