I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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