what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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