So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Alive.
So much puke
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
