bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
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Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
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How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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