Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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