Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
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