U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We talked him into tasing himself.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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