i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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