He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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