oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Randomize
