Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
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but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
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I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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