Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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