Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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